There are generally two schools of thought in language studies: grammarians who believe language should be governed by a set of rules instituted by a group of experts and disseminated to the masses. And then there are linguists who believe language usage should be governed the common man who speaks the language. For all those linguists in this world who believe our language needs no expert governing, I offer just one counter argument: parents naming their children.
I believe the state of baby-naming in our country is in utter chaos. Why is it parents think they need to be "creative" when naming their child? Even if a child has a normal name, like "Amy," it's spelled something like "Aymiee." No, really. After looking through a list of ridiculous names with my roommate, a junior-high teacher, I've decided parents are deliberately trying to make their children's lives difficult. Don't get me wrong: if a name is unusual because it comes from a different culture or is popular in a different language, I see no problem with that. I also see no problem with names that are a little unusual but are spelled phonetically, such as my own name (really, how hard can it be to pronounce "Maurianne"?). I just don't agree with strange new names or old names with ridiculous spellings.
Are these the people we want making decisions about how normal words are spelled, pronounced, or linked together to form sentences? I shutter to think. If those who name their children with reckless abandon (such as "Aliviyah") had control of any communication to the masses, I'm afraid we would have a true crisis on our hands. In fact, maybe we need a list of approved spellings for names. That way people who know nothing about phonetics or history of names can't mess up their children's lives by giving them names that are impossible to pronounce at first glance. Where's Samuel Johnson when you need him?
